Ask a Counselor: How Do I Live a More Peaceful Life?

Hello ! I am a 50 year old unemployed individual who is single and never married. I live with my folks and they are the only family I have. In spite of never drinking nor smoking nor doing drugs – my family and I through work and other problems wound up living in a rather negative environment with unfriendly, rather hostile people, and a highly polarized area.

-Ronald

Dear Ronald,

Thanks for writing and I think it’s great that you want to try to improve your situation in a positive manner. If you desire to live a peaceful life then this has to start within. If you don’t feel peaceful on the inside, then you can’t possibly live in peace with others.

Inner peace isn’t easy, but I believe that it comes through knowing ourselves, learning to love and accept ourselves, and ultimately coming to know God who is the only one that loves us so perfectly. Some things about ourselves we have the power to change while others we cannot change. It’s the things that we cannot change that often trips us up and causes unrest. When we learn to let go of those things and love ourselves as God loves us, it is very freeing.

Another step to living a more positive, peaceful life is making amends to the people we’ve hurt or wronged. When we take responsibility for the ways we’ve treated people unlovingly, we can ask for forgiveness, let it go, and move on putting that behind us. Along the same lines learning to forgive those who wronged us can be very freeing. You can forgive people whether they have asked for it or not as true forgiveness is a gift.

As far as other things in your life, I would recommend establishing some small goals and begin taking steps to complete them. These could be things like eating healthier, exercising more, volunteering, and maybe retraining for a new job. It’s good in times like yours to take action especially during a season where you have extra hours to devote to bettering your life.

I pray all the best for you and your family and remember that you have value and the world is a better place because you’re in it.

Kind regards,

Ted