Ask a Counselor: Shunned, Teased, and Ridiculed Due to TMAU

No one knows what it’s like to be me. All people do is talk about me. They talk about me to my face and laugh about me behind my back.

They call me names and go all out of their way to make my life miserable. They make it their business to let me know that I’m not welcomed. Their taunts and sneers makes me feel less than human and it’s the same everywhere I go. I cannot escape this indifference and the mental torture is the worst. People even gather around my front door just to talk about me and make me feel ashamed for being human.

I often hold my head down as there is no one who’s on my side and I have no where to turn. My whole life has been like this. People have always shunned me. I have a rare medical disorder (TMAU), for which there is no cure. People don’t know that about me and instead treat me like scum of the earth.

I often think about ending it all. I think “why wake up and face another day if it’s just going to be a repeat from the day before”? Why continue to put myself through it? What do I have to live for? No one wants me around. What do I have to live for? Look forward to?

I would like for someone to write me back, please. I have been on other “Christian” sites and have tried to tell my story in hopes that someone would hear my cry and reach out to me, but they, too, were just as indifferent as no one so much as even emailed me back. I don’t know why I’m here? For what purpose am I serving?

Please….Please someone write me back.

-Annabeth

Dear Annabeth,

Thanks for writing and I’m saddened by what you’ve had to endure and my heart goes out to you. No one deserves to be made fun of and to be made to feel worthless.

People can be very cruel and out of their own fear and insecurities they do horrible unspeakable things to people who are different or have obvious weaknesses. Please know that your “torture” has more to do with their internal issues than it actually has to do with you.

First I would like to assure you that you have worth, meaning, and purpose because you are a child of God and I assure you that He is especially fond of you, Annabeth. I’m sure he has blessed you with gifts and talents that only you can offer the world.

Second, you have two choices here. You can  let these people destroy you or you can rise above and use your trials as a way to help others. Never before have we lived in an age where it is so easy for you to reach out to other people with TMAU via the internet. You could form a group on facebook that could unite those suffering and also raise awareness about the disorder.

People are afraid of what they don’t understand and often this fear is displayed by being despicable to what they don’t understand. I suggest you work to raise awareness of TMAU and come out into the light and no longer be ashamed that you have this. It is not your fault. One important step others in similar situations as yours have done to overcome is to own  their problem and not be ashamed for there is nothing to be ashamed of.

The possiblities are many for you Annabeth and another suggestion would be for you to start a blog about your disorder, where you can share your struggles and even write about the latest research concerning TMAU. I can tell by your question that you have excellent writing skills. I would be happy to give you pointers on getting started with that.

In closing, I do care and I hope you realize how special you are. I can’t wait to hear about how you’ve decided to take action so please keep me posted in the comments below.

Kindest regards,

Ted

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Comments (6)

Miguel December 1st, 2009 at 12:56 am    

Hello, my name is Miguel

i was so upset after reading Annabeth’s story!
i could not believe that people would actually have the nerve and be so dark to another human being. But then after reading Ted’s response it became clear to me:
i was doing the same thing to myself. i believed my own negative hurtful thoughts and insecurities; i was letting it take root and begin to wonder how i was of any importance to the people close to me and would i be of any to those i have never met.

i forgot how special i am to the world and to the world around me, i am loved.

i am loved by people like Anabeth; whose story has saved mine.

So thank you Annabeth, for posting your story. you are loved.

Miguel-

GERALDINE February 13th, 2010 at 4:15 pm    

Annabeth,

As a christian I am also surprised by the lack of sympathy in chritian communities. I have not been officially diagnosed but seem to have this problem.I feel like writing an article for a women`s magazine. It would probably describe the disease as the `new leprosy`. With other problems, there is sympathy. With TMAU,there is condemnation, ostracism and criticism.
I am trying to understand what might be the spiritual roots of this curse.

The two things I have come up with are fear and generational adultery.
Fear paralyzes our organs and might

stop or inhibit the production of enzymes. Adultery is punished by disease of the liver (Proverbs)and FMO is produced by the liver.
GERALDINE

not given December 14th, 2010 at 6:09 am    

Anabeth, I am truly sorry you had to go through that. I believe people do know what they are doing, but that is just me. Perhaps it is because they do not know about the disorder. TMAU has affected me at a time later in life, so those people who have made hurtful comments, talked behind my back are old enough to know what they have done to me. I like to think that those people will reap what they sow.
It is draining and exhausting. My family does not understand the pain it causes me just to attend family functions. See, my family has told me that they don’t smell anything. One of those stories.
Please do not give up hope. I have just started my own blog about TMAU. It is a good release. Please visit my blog and let me know of any comments or ideas you have. It’s my first and I am learning. To all those who posted comments here, god bless.

Adrienne March 23rd, 2012 at 11:10 am    

Hi Annabeth,

I’m 31 y/o and have lived my entire life with TMAU. My condition (extreme foul breath odor) seemed to worsen in my late 20s, so I began experiencing the ridicule and snarky remarks from my peers late in life. I expected kids and teenagers to be insensitive, but I never expected women in their 30′s, 40′s and on to be so cruel. I think this disorder is worse for girls and women as society expects us to be ‘sweet-smelling’ and perfect. Anyway, I started taking Copper Chlorophyllin capsules (brand name: Chlorofresh) daily for the last few months and I have noticed a huge reduction in my odor. When I speak to people they don’t wrinkle their noses anymore and I don’t feel shunned. I’ve heard that Copper Chlorophyllin can be helpful with controlling TMAU symptoms and it’s certainly worked miracles for me. I noticed a huge difference by the 3rd day!

Don’t give up Annabeth. You seem like a special, intelligent young lady and I’m sure that your life will get better.

God Bless!

–Adrienne

BikerLady April 16th, 2012 at 2:06 pm    

Hi Annabeth,

Not sure if you still check this site but if you do please reply. My story is exactly the same as yours. The taunts from people, and there need to humiliate you is the worse to overcome. Some days I’m strong enough to endure it but many days I am not. Definitely write back. Are you on the East Coast? Would love to find a meet group in my area.

Rina May 6th, 2012 at 1:43 am    

Hi, I’m sorry you deal with this. I too have the same condition. I get ridiculed at work and laughed by my instructors. It’s hard for anyone to relate, if this disorder is percieved as a hygiene problem. I even have issues when visiting my local church. I am a leader in the church which makes it so much worse. I pray for you and others with our condition. Not only our condition, but sickness and disease in the body of Christ. Ask God to give you peace. I have experienced that even when they talk about me, He gave me peace so I wasn’t nervous or afraid. God bless you. Trust God.

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