Dear Beth,

I sometimes have trouble understanding why young adults jump so quickly into these serious relationships. There is a big world out there and a lot of things to discover.

I often have seen situations like yours play out time and time again and I think it boils down to a person’s need to find themselves. However, “the grass is always greener” can apply to this situation as well.

There’s no guaranteeing you’ll be happier by moving home, going to college, and partying. In fact, you could be less happy without love in your life.

My advice would be to be honest with your boyfriend and explain to him that you need a little freedom to explore life a bit. I think in your case you may be able to have both, but you first need to be open and honest about how you’re feeling.

Perhaps you and he can save money for some international travel, or perhaps he will be ok with you going out with friends more.

I do know that the “party scene” is pretty short lived for most people. It’s hard on the body, the wallet, and relationships. Some people get sucked into that lifestyle and never recover.

However, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with exploring life a bit before you marry and have kids. This wouldn’t have to be alone and I think you could do this with your boyfriend at your side.

All the best,

Ted