I’ll try to make this short — but there really is a lot involved. Most of which probably won’t get touched on here.
We have been married for 13 1/2 years, and I can probably count the number of times we’ve slept together on both hands. During the beginning of our marriage, sex was more frequent – maybe once every couple of months, but we have not had relations now in 8 years.

I don’t know what to do anymore and I feel like a maid or a roommate instead of a wife. I really want the marriage to work, but I didn’t sign up for this. I’m not looking for it every night, but 8 years without? I don’t think I’m being unreasonable. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s weird. I graduated from Towson and I’m about to buy a house. I have a good job, even though I feel that I’m not using all of my abilities to do the manual labor, I’m not too sad about where I work.

My main problem is that I need a woman in my life. All my life I’ve had girlfriends that I was happy with, but about 4 years ago I went through a terrible time that, looking back, has cursed me. I was dating this beautiful girl named Jen from Australia. We dated for over a year and we were very happy together, but when I came back from Australia and she stayed, I cheated on her. I told her about it and when she wanted to stay together, I said that I wanted to be single.

This is the reason I feel cursed. The girl I cheated on her with gave me genital warts and didn’t tell me she had it and she was really messed up in the head. She cheated on me numerous times and just caused so much pain in my life that I was very depressed and took the illness straight to heart, vowing not to give it to someone else in the hurtful way it was given to me. I didn’t have sex for two years. Read the rest of this entry »

This is one question that I hear a lot and it deserves some time and thought especially when it seems that  many Christians are more messed up sexually than those not having a particular faith.

Growing up in church, I was taught that any sexual acts or thoughts outside of marriage was wrong and lustful and of course the Bible was used as justification of this. Also, sexual sin was put up on a pedestal as being the worst while other sins were acceptable or minor. For instance, don’t masturbate, but it’s Ok if I pleasure myself with 5 plates of food at the church pot luck.

If the Bible is a sexual manual, what would it tell us?

• More than one wife is acceptable. Read the rest of this entry »

I will try to make this as short as possible but to the point. My wife and I are both Christians. We have been married 16 years. She was a virgin when we married and STILL is today, 16+ years later. Yes, you read that correct, we have never had sex.

My wife is also very verbally abusive, all the classic signs, I never do anything right, name calling, everything is my fault, etc. and she does not think there is anything wrong with her, it is all me.

I guess I have stayed this long because for most of our marriage we were in church leadership and I did not want to be seen as a hypocrite, as I am not a fan of divorce and did not want to set a “bad” example.

We have been out of leadership for about 3 years and I’m at the point of leaving. When confronted she may be a little better for a couple of weeks, but then goes to back to her old ways.

She has no desire for me sexually, anything sexual has always been her being pleased. In fact she has stated numerous times, touching me in a sexual way is DISGUSTING. Her idea of counseling is that I go – because I need help. So what to do?

-Brett

Dear Brett

First, I would like to thank you Read the rest of this entry »