Ask a Counselor: How Can I Have Inner Peace?

I am 50 year old single Male who has been unemployed now for 2 + years and struggling to find a job in this economy. In addition, I live with my wonderful parents who are very loving – were it not for them I would surely be homeless. My family and I are also looking to move from this area. Everything is piling up. I have also had not the best luck in getting along with peers and in the past I made several mistakes of which I have come to regret and hope the past does not come back to haunt me. Luckily, none of these mistakes were crimes–I have always tried to lead a clean life with no smoking, no drinking, and no drugs.

-Donald

Dear Donald,

Thanks for writing and it sounds like you have been dealing with a lot lately. I believe that inner peace is achieved by doing 3 things. Learning to love God, yourself, and others. When we can love God and accept that He loves us just as we are then we can love ourselves, when we love ourselves, we can love others without agenda.

This promotes inner peace because we can learn to accept our short comings and insufficiency and realize that all of us on the planet are a beautiful mess. When we love others this gives us purpose and meaning to our lives. What’s great about all of this is that it’s independent of any type of church. Besides, I think church is most importantly about the people and the relationships more so than the style. I’ve been to many “bible stressing” churches that preach to not drink, but treat each other horribly with the gossip, backbiting and all.

Find a church where the people really love each other and their community. Find ways to get out there and show love to others by volunteering somewhere, especially in this season where you’re not working. It will do wonders for your sense of peace. If you want to read a good book about how God views you and others, I recommend The Shack, it really is a powerful book.

All the best and keep us posted on how things are going in the comments below.

Kindest regards,

Ted