Ask a Counselor: My Friend’s Being Verbally Abused by Her Parents

My best friend is being verbally abused by her parents. They constantly put her down, telling her that her that straight A grades aren’t good enough and that she isn’t good enough for them.

-Lilyclaire

Dear Lilyclaire,

I think that it’s great that you want to help your friend, she is lucky to have a friend like you, one that isn’t afraid to get her hands dirty by getting involved in a tough family situation.

I think you are on the right track with your approach to help her. You can talk to your guidance counselor about this, but it would be even better if you could get your friend to come along with you to see the counselor and tell the counselor personally about the verbal abuse she is living under. Although there is no physical abuse there are still steps the guidance counselor can take in order to help your friend.

He or she may decide to have a conference with the parents and also refer them to some type of family counseling in order for the parents to understand that how they treat their daughter is extremely unhealthy and damaging to her. In any event, I think that it’s important to get some other adults involved such as your guidance counselor.

As her friend make sure you encourage her and keep reminding her that the stuff her parents say isn’t true and be an ear to listen when she needs it. Again, I think it’s great that you want to help your friend out of this verbally abusive situation and I pray that your friend  and her family will get the help that they desperately need.

Sincerely,

Ted