Reuniting With The Child I Gave Up

I am attempting to reunited with a child of mine who is 11 years old. I have never been a part of her life but, I have found myself to be a good father to my sons who are 6 and 8.

-Joe

Dear Joe,

This can definitely be a sensitive issue as there can be a lot of hurt feelings involved. Perhaps you can start slowly by just taking her out for ice cream or a lunch. I think during your outing you really need to speak to this girl from your heart. Often children in these situations have a lot of hurt and questions. They often feel as though it was their fault that they were abandoned.

Just be real clear to her that it wasn’t her fault and that you love her. Make effort to spend time with her even if she resists and keep trying because she could be testing your resolve and seeing if you really do love her and are serious about being in her life.

Just take this a step at a time and let her call the shots according to what she’s comfortable with. Girls really need to know that they are cherished and thought of as beautiful by their fathers. Shower her with love and make her feel like a princess.

All the best,

Ted