Why Can’t I Be Faithful to My Boyfriend?
Why can’t I stop cheating? I have a boyfriend of almost 10 months and I’m hurting him because I can’t stop. We’re on a break right now because he found out that I told a boy something I shouldn’t of.
This has been going on throughout our whole relationship and he doesn’t deserve it. We’re taking a two week break and I need to take this opportunity to change.
I’m 17 years old, too close to an adult to keep playing these games, but this started with the first boyfriend I ever had, so I need the attention, but my boyfriend is enough for me. It’s gotten a lot better, but I need help to know what to do in a cheating situation.
-Cheaterwaheart
Dear Cheaterwaheart,
Thanks for your question. I’m not sure why you are pressuring yourself to be in such “adult” committed relationships when clearly you aren’t ready for that nor do you have to be ready.
Now is the time of life that you should be dating a lot of different boys so that you can figure out what you want in a guy. You have so much life in front of you and plenty of time to be serious. Right now, I say have fun and avoid serious relationships. You are just learning who you are as a person and it is proven that people that wait longer to commit and be serious actually have better, stronger relationships and even more successful marriages.
I think this break should be a lasting thing as both you and your boyfriend need to get out there and explore the world and get to know all types of boys and girls so you both can later settle with the one that’s right for you.
All the best,
Ted
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Comments (2)
I’m a college student in a long distance relationship. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over two years- starting when I was a junior in high school and he was a senior. When he first went to school, I decided to give him some space by taking a break from the relationship, so he didn’t feel like he was tied down. We ended up getting back together very quickly- not liking the separation. When I went to school this year, we decided to do the same thing, but again got back together very quickly. Things were great when my boyfriend- Mark- went to college. I was very secure that he was faithful, and we stayed in touch very well.
Things are not going so well with me in school. I cheated on him once, felt extremely guilty, and told him about it a few months later. It was tough for us, but we stayed together and turned out fine. The problem is, I have cheated again. This time I don’t feel as guilty, and I have not told him. School is almost over, so soon we will be together again for most of the summer. I don’t know what to do about our relationship. The thing is I am always very tempted to be with other people while out partying at school. I become very attracted to others and find it fun being with someone new. But I love Mark and don’t want to be without him this summer. What should I do in this situation? I can’t imagine telling him I’ve cheated again.
Hi Kaite, As I told the young lady above, you cheat because you aren’t ready for a serious committed relationship nor do you have to be at your age. It’s much healthier to date around and find out exactly what you want in a husband. Exclusive relationships seldom work when the couples separates because of college. It’s better to let each other go and revisit your feelings for each other after school is over and when you’re ready to settle down.
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